Hiding in a ranty ramble while Trying to Understand where the lines are drawn and wishing for rEdemption
'Drawing the line' - an innocuous little phrase at first glance. Pick up a pencil and make a long straight mark on a sheet of paper. Or use your finger or a stick to drag a line across sand. It's creative. Lasting (though not in sand). A demarcation of sorts. It says, I am here. This is my mark. It is a beginning; a boundary between what you were before you drew the line and what you are now. Life after drawing the line is different. Changed. Redefined.
Thus, we understand the literal meaning of drawing the line. And perhaps how drawing a line can change us. But metaphorically, as it is often used, what does it really mean?
Drawing the line: definition - idiom, meaning to put a limit on your actions or to avoid doing something because you think it is wrong.
People draw the (aspirational, imaginary) line in different situations all the time. Different people draw different lines. Or versions of the same lines but set at different levels. Some lines are - or should be - common across all peoples.
As G K Chesterton said, 'Morality consists of drawing the line somewhere.'
Morality; drawing the line between right and wrong. Underscoring what is right. Emphasising the way ahead. Or as a legal constraint - below the line you break the law; you are a scoundrel, a vagrant, a thief, a liar, a cheat. But what if the line moves; if it is not fixed; if defining or interpreting the line becomes blurred?
In our own lives we operate within lines drawn by law and nature. But within those lines we draw our own. We use them to set targets - this is the grade I want to achieve; the promotion level I want; the amount of chocolate eaten that I will not exceed every day; the fitness level I want to attain; the number of books I want to read in a year; the number of coffees I will limit myself to in a day; the words I will use and those that I never will; how far I will let myself be pushed at work and the level at which I regard that pushing as exploitation; the amount I will spend on new clothes before I blush and try to hide the bags; the word count I wish I could achieve every day and the laws I would risk breaking if I had to.
Fall through our lines and we sink and drown. Climb above them and we risk being out of our depth. Both line crossing scenarios to be avoided, if possible.
But what if the line you draw for yourself and your family or team is drawn publicly. And because it is out there in the public eye it is scrutinised constantly by a pack of scandal-hungry journalists all clamouring for the slightest sign that your nobly constructed line has been stretched. You know they will bay in victory if your lines are breached. And that your downfall - the wreckage of everything you believed in; your morals; your honour; your mantra - will be excruciating. Would you risk it? Risk ever having to ask yourself why you took such a righteous stance. Why you set your lines so high that they were bound to crack? Why you trusted others to respect your lines? Why you were blinkered when you should have been vigilant?
Okay, so you're probably wondering what caffeine fuelled ramble my brain has wandered off on. But you might have guessed where this might be going. If you haven't it will become more obvious shortly but not hopefully I'm-going-to-get-trolled-obvious. If you still haven't a clue, the message at the end is for you and you can skip the next bit.
Here goes - feet first into a hole of my own digging or a plea for redemption? And no, in case you wondered, I'm not taking sides - read this and interpret it yourself. Draw your own lines. Decide who you wish redemption for.
NICE - the drug regulation authority that provides guidelines for treatment of illnesses within the NHS in England and Wales - is clear on the prescription of medication for asthma. Asthma treatment starts with a stepwise progression in inhaler strengths - preventers and relievers - the familiar brown and blue inhalers, of gym bags, sports kits, sleepover suitcases, handbags and pockets. The brown or orange or sometimes purple ones are steroid inhalers and the dose prescribed depends on the severity and frequency of asthma symptoms. Asthmatics sometimes have acute exacerbations when their cough and wheeze and shortness of breath get suddenly and sometimes dramatically worse. When this happens - usually over a few hours or a few days - their need for the instant, relieving medication (the blue inhalers) increases. Sometimes, increasing the blue inhaler is not enough. Typically, in this state the asthmatic has a 'tight chest', can't speak whole sentences, is only comfortable sitting still in a stiff upright posture and has their shoulders raised as they struggle to use the accessory muscles in their chest wall to help them to breathe. An asthmatic in this state needs help. They won't be shifting much air in and out of their lungs - their peak flow rate will have plummeted and they may not be wheezing. Their oxygen saturation will have dropped and they will feel terrible. I paint a picture that is not at all infrequent in the primary care and emergency department setting. These patients need rescuing. They can't breathe properly. They struggle to speak. Exertion is impossible. They need steroids. Fast.
Usually and following the NICE guidelines they will be given five days of high dose oral steroids. And will be monitored in case of deterioration and a need for emergency hospital admission.
So - asthmatic - acutely unwell - unable to exercise - given oral steroids. Fine. Normal management.
An article in the Annals of Emergency Medicine in 1998, concluded that 'when compliance with a daily oral regimen (of steroid) is of concern, a single intramuscular injection of steroid would appear to be an attractive alternative.' Their words not mine. An alternative when the patient is sick enough to need oral steroids but would either not remember or struggle to fit taking them into their life.
Surely, being sick enough to need steroids would not be something you would forget. Repeatedly. Plus, acute exacerbations of asthma usually appear at random. Random ...
That's one interpretation. Of what? I'm not saying.
What are the chances of acute exacerbations occurring repeatedly at the same time each year? Perhaps, if you suffer from hay fever the odds are actually quite high.
Perhaps, if your life's ambition depends on not letting the allergies that have blighted your fitness in the past blight it again; perhaps then, you could have a steroid injection to prevent that acute deterioration that would prevent you from breathing properly. Perhaps. But where does that leave the lines - the lines that govern what medication you are permitted - are they blurred; stretched; manipulated or blown away?
Two interpretations. But I did mention redemption. Didn't I?
Ultimately, we know ourselves if we have crossed the line. An honourable man will remain honourable to the end. But he might have to take the flack if on his watch others have crossed his hallowed lines. If he was responsible ultimately for the behaviour of others, then the buck has to stop with him and he will have to take the blame. He deserves it, of course, if he breached his lines himself. But if he didn't, he will inevitably ask himself if he drew them too high; if he believed too much in the goodness of others; and if he was dazzled and guilty of turning a blind eye. Maybe, no-one did anything wrong. Maybe, time will ink over the faint lines making them stronger. Maybe, good intention, integrity and honesty will win out in the end. And maybe redemption will be climbed towards and reached, one newly drawn line at a time.
Rant and ramble over; I am sorry if I lost you. It was just something I felt needed saying. Unfairness needs a voice. You can decide where the unfairness lies; if indeed it lies at all.
Go and draw your own lines - not in sand if you want them to last. Define your own integrity and push those lines to your own limits.
I'll try to get back to the dogs and funny tomorrow. Perhaps it's the whiff of rotting mouse corpse spreading through the house that's souring my brain. Pickled in stink and running out of scented candles ... I think the garden beckons.
Thus, we understand the literal meaning of drawing the line. And perhaps how drawing a line can change us. But metaphorically, as it is often used, what does it really mean?
Drawing the line: definition - idiom, meaning to put a limit on your actions or to avoid doing something because you think it is wrong.
People draw the (aspirational, imaginary) line in different situations all the time. Different people draw different lines. Or versions of the same lines but set at different levels. Some lines are - or should be - common across all peoples.
As G K Chesterton said, 'Morality consists of drawing the line somewhere.'
Morality; drawing the line between right and wrong. Underscoring what is right. Emphasising the way ahead. Or as a legal constraint - below the line you break the law; you are a scoundrel, a vagrant, a thief, a liar, a cheat. But what if the line moves; if it is not fixed; if defining or interpreting the line becomes blurred?
In our own lives we operate within lines drawn by law and nature. But within those lines we draw our own. We use them to set targets - this is the grade I want to achieve; the promotion level I want; the amount of chocolate eaten that I will not exceed every day; the fitness level I want to attain; the number of books I want to read in a year; the number of coffees I will limit myself to in a day; the words I will use and those that I never will; how far I will let myself be pushed at work and the level at which I regard that pushing as exploitation; the amount I will spend on new clothes before I blush and try to hide the bags; the word count I wish I could achieve every day and the laws I would risk breaking if I had to.
Fall through our lines and we sink and drown. Climb above them and we risk being out of our depth. Both line crossing scenarios to be avoided, if possible.
But what if the line you draw for yourself and your family or team is drawn publicly. And because it is out there in the public eye it is scrutinised constantly by a pack of scandal-hungry journalists all clamouring for the slightest sign that your nobly constructed line has been stretched. You know they will bay in victory if your lines are breached. And that your downfall - the wreckage of everything you believed in; your morals; your honour; your mantra - will be excruciating. Would you risk it? Risk ever having to ask yourself why you took such a righteous stance. Why you set your lines so high that they were bound to crack? Why you trusted others to respect your lines? Why you were blinkered when you should have been vigilant?
Okay, so you're probably wondering what caffeine fuelled ramble my brain has wandered off on. But you might have guessed where this might be going. If you haven't it will become more obvious shortly but not hopefully I'm-going-to-get-trolled-obvious. If you still haven't a clue, the message at the end is for you and you can skip the next bit.
Here goes - feet first into a hole of my own digging or a plea for redemption? And no, in case you wondered, I'm not taking sides - read this and interpret it yourself. Draw your own lines. Decide who you wish redemption for.
NICE - the drug regulation authority that provides guidelines for treatment of illnesses within the NHS in England and Wales - is clear on the prescription of medication for asthma. Asthma treatment starts with a stepwise progression in inhaler strengths - preventers and relievers - the familiar brown and blue inhalers, of gym bags, sports kits, sleepover suitcases, handbags and pockets. The brown or orange or sometimes purple ones are steroid inhalers and the dose prescribed depends on the severity and frequency of asthma symptoms. Asthmatics sometimes have acute exacerbations when their cough and wheeze and shortness of breath get suddenly and sometimes dramatically worse. When this happens - usually over a few hours or a few days - their need for the instant, relieving medication (the blue inhalers) increases. Sometimes, increasing the blue inhaler is not enough. Typically, in this state the asthmatic has a 'tight chest', can't speak whole sentences, is only comfortable sitting still in a stiff upright posture and has their shoulders raised as they struggle to use the accessory muscles in their chest wall to help them to breathe. An asthmatic in this state needs help. They won't be shifting much air in and out of their lungs - their peak flow rate will have plummeted and they may not be wheezing. Their oxygen saturation will have dropped and they will feel terrible. I paint a picture that is not at all infrequent in the primary care and emergency department setting. These patients need rescuing. They can't breathe properly. They struggle to speak. Exertion is impossible. They need steroids. Fast.
Usually and following the NICE guidelines they will be given five days of high dose oral steroids. And will be monitored in case of deterioration and a need for emergency hospital admission.
So - asthmatic - acutely unwell - unable to exercise - given oral steroids. Fine. Normal management.
An article in the Annals of Emergency Medicine in 1998, concluded that 'when compliance with a daily oral regimen (of steroid) is of concern, a single intramuscular injection of steroid would appear to be an attractive alternative.' Their words not mine. An alternative when the patient is sick enough to need oral steroids but would either not remember or struggle to fit taking them into their life.
Surely, being sick enough to need steroids would not be something you would forget. Repeatedly. Plus, acute exacerbations of asthma usually appear at random. Random ...
That's one interpretation. Of what? I'm not saying.
What are the chances of acute exacerbations occurring repeatedly at the same time each year? Perhaps, if you suffer from hay fever the odds are actually quite high.
Perhaps, if your life's ambition depends on not letting the allergies that have blighted your fitness in the past blight it again; perhaps then, you could have a steroid injection to prevent that acute deterioration that would prevent you from breathing properly. Perhaps. But where does that leave the lines - the lines that govern what medication you are permitted - are they blurred; stretched; manipulated or blown away?
Two interpretations. But I did mention redemption. Didn't I?
Ultimately, we know ourselves if we have crossed the line. An honourable man will remain honourable to the end. But he might have to take the flack if on his watch others have crossed his hallowed lines. If he was responsible ultimately for the behaviour of others, then the buck has to stop with him and he will have to take the blame. He deserves it, of course, if he breached his lines himself. But if he didn't, he will inevitably ask himself if he drew them too high; if he believed too much in the goodness of others; and if he was dazzled and guilty of turning a blind eye. Maybe, no-one did anything wrong. Maybe, time will ink over the faint lines making them stronger. Maybe, good intention, integrity and honesty will win out in the end. And maybe redemption will be climbed towards and reached, one newly drawn line at a time.
Rant and ramble over; I am sorry if I lost you. It was just something I felt needed saying. Unfairness needs a voice. You can decide where the unfairness lies; if indeed it lies at all.
Go and draw your own lines - not in sand if you want them to last. Define your own integrity and push those lines to your own limits.
I'll try to get back to the dogs and funny tomorrow. Perhaps it's the whiff of rotting mouse corpse spreading through the house that's souring my brain. Pickled in stink and running out of scented candles ... I think the garden beckons.
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